Thursday, December 22, 2005

Hola everyone! Well, blogging isn't really a thing i can spend time doing now. Because lots of stuff is going thru my mind, lots of problems. To sort it all up, i can put it in Coldplay's single.

When you try your best but you don't succeed...
When you get what you want but not what you need...
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep...
Stuck in reverse...
And the tears come streaming down your face...
When you lose something you can't replace...(Alright, i did not lose something really. But there are something done that i can't replace.)

The stuff that i had done the whole year. It screwed me up. I should have done all my assignments. I should have pay more attention in classes. I should have stay in library and study more.
Some say that study smart is the way. Some say study hard is the way. So which? I'd follow both of them. About a month before my final exam, i started staying back in library to study. Winnie told me to stay back like few months before that, but i didn't heed her word( I should have listen to you dear). You know what miracle can be done for just staying back in library at least 3 or 4 times a week? I know what it can do...Push up ur results! Yeah, it did push up my results...but not much. The only miracle only happened to my specialist maths subject.
I used to get a score of 2 or 3/20 for specialist maths. That's real bad right?! Yea, so i stayed back the month before exam, almost everyday, from 8am till 8pm. Hey! I don't nerd the whole day! I take occasional breaks walking around, shoot some hoops, and have a drink or maybe chat with friends. That one month, to be more exact its about 3 weeks only I think. I pushed my results, from 3/20 up to 10/20. That's one hell of a achievement in just 3 weeks! No, I'm not implementing that I'm fucking smart. But its just to tell, study hard and study smart does work on me. Well, i brought my specialist maths results up much higher than before. What about other subjects? A pure disappointment.

English as Second Language - From 14 to 14/20
Chemistry - From 11 to 11/20
Physics - From 11 to 13/20
Maths - From 11 to 13/20

English, is a subject not everyone can score high. Practically, I'm quite happy with my english results. Taking into account that my language really sucks. But others, I'm not happy. I targeted to score at least 15 for my chem, physics, and maths. But look what happened? Maybe I'm panic? I don't know...I just think i did not put in much effort in these subjects. Taking it for granted. So, yesterday was my result day. I was so damn scared. Freaked out. After checking my results, both excited and very sad. I was happy that my specialist maths got a 10/20, although my target was 12/20. And looking at others makes me sad. Even sadder, when i got my over results. The raw score and the TER(Tertiary Entrance Ranking) score. I got 62 for my raw score and 67.75 for my TER. Go on...LAUGH! HAHAHA!!! SOO GUAN IS SO STUPID!!! fuck...Its so damn terrible okay. Which uni would want to accept me? Which?! All I have in mind is to repeat SAM. But hey! The top scorer for last yr SAM did repeat too! Why can't I?! But...everyone in SAM next year going to laugh at me in class and everywhere. Haunting me. Sigh...I don't know what to do...ciao...

About me

  • I'm Soo Guan, Ng
  • From Malaysia
  • This isA stupid thing
www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from Soo Guan. Make your own badge here.