Life sucks...
You guys out there, some of you may think that i have a great life. No. You're god damn wrong. I may not seem to be what it looks like to you. No one in this world knows me. Not even the best of my friends, not even the one closest to me. People always "assume" things about me, they do not know me. Not even my family. Is there anyone out there who really know me? No. I don't think there will be any. Those who think they know me, they only know less than quarter of me. Do you think you really know what i want? Do you really know what i'm thinking? Do you really know how i work my way around? Do you really know that I'm trying my very best? Do you even know that I'm actually suffering? HELL NO! NO ONE KNOWS!
Why is it that everytime, when i ask for something, i get the opposite thing. I never get what i wished for. The luxury that i had, i didn't ask for that. Why is it when i pray for the poor, they end up worse? Where the hell is GOD?! There is no God. Prove to me there is one...He never showed any sign to me that he's around. Not even a single bit. If God exist, there wouldn't be anyone suffering. Human are God's beloved creature? Bullshit. Why is there so many people suffering? Why would there be innocent people suffering, starving, and dying without love? And why the hell people that do all the bad things, end up living with all they asked for? My faith grows stronger not with God, but with the believe that God don't exist. Do you really think there's heaven and hell? Heaven are for good guys and Hell are for the bad ones? It may just be some created story to tell you, so that you won't do any bad things. Do God really exist? No. My prayers hadn't been heard. None of them. God is busy? Bullshit... We live by our own. We save our own asses. We work our own ways. But some people just can't stop controlling us. I hate being controlled.
*(To those who believe in God. You may do so. I do not object your beliefs. and i have nothing against you. If you don't like what i'm saying here. Just fuck off alrite? Just walk away silently. Don't attempt to tell me anything about God. Because all i heard about God is no true. So go away...)
I'm suffering...Do you even know that? My heart is full with ache...Do you even know that? I always feel like dying...Do you even know that? Don't be surprised if one day, you will need to come for my orbituary. Or you may see in the newspaper, a teenager died in a tragic accident, teenager died while sleeping, teenager gone crazy. Many times, i thought of suicide. But something in my heart, so heavy that i couldn't kill myself. Something in my heart i must seek out. Everytime i laugh with you guys, you think I'm actually happy? It may be decieving. Sometimes, i look sick, do you think i'm really ill? No one knows my way around.
Someday, i'm going to be rich. Not in my properties, money, or luxury. I'm going to be rich in life. I'm going to pursue my studies, and earn all the money that i could. For the suffering ones, the innocent ones. Someday, you will see me in Africa. I'm not on a tour there. Someday, you will see me working there, working without getting paid. Someday, you will see me alone, leading a solitary life. With no one attached to me. Unless, i found someone who truly undestands me. But, no one understands a bit close to what I'm thinking. No one...
"Coldplau - Square One"
You're in control, is there anywhere you wanna go?
You're in control, is there anything you wanna know?
The future's for discovering
The space in which we're travelling
From the top of the first page
To the end of the last day
From the start in your own way
You just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are
Under the surface trying to break through
Deciphering the codes in you
I need a compass, draw me a map
I'm on the top, I can't get back
Whoa whoa
The first line on the first page
To the end of the last page
From the start in your own way
You just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are
You just want
Somebody listening to what you say
Oh, you just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are
Is there anybody out there who
Is lost and hurt and lonely too
Are they bleeding all your colours into one?
and if you come undone
As if you've been run through
Some catapult it fired you
You wonder if your chance will ever come
Or if you're stuck in square one
You guys out there, some of you may think that i have a great life. No. You're god damn wrong. I may not seem to be what it looks like to you. No one in this world knows me. Not even the best of my friends, not even the one closest to me. People always "assume" things about me, they do not know me. Not even my family. Is there anyone out there who really know me? No. I don't think there will be any. Those who think they know me, they only know less than quarter of me. Do you think you really know what i want? Do you really know what i'm thinking? Do you really know how i work my way around? Do you really know that I'm trying my very best? Do you even know that I'm actually suffering? HELL NO! NO ONE KNOWS!
Why is it that everytime, when i ask for something, i get the opposite thing. I never get what i wished for. The luxury that i had, i didn't ask for that. Why is it when i pray for the poor, they end up worse? Where the hell is GOD?! There is no God. Prove to me there is one...He never showed any sign to me that he's around. Not even a single bit. If God exist, there wouldn't be anyone suffering. Human are God's beloved creature? Bullshit. Why is there so many people suffering? Why would there be innocent people suffering, starving, and dying without love? And why the hell people that do all the bad things, end up living with all they asked for? My faith grows stronger not with God, but with the believe that God don't exist. Do you really think there's heaven and hell? Heaven are for good guys and Hell are for the bad ones? It may just be some created story to tell you, so that you won't do any bad things. Do God really exist? No. My prayers hadn't been heard. None of them. God is busy? Bullshit... We live by our own. We save our own asses. We work our own ways. But some people just can't stop controlling us. I hate being controlled.
*(To those who believe in God. You may do so. I do not object your beliefs. and i have nothing against you. If you don't like what i'm saying here. Just fuck off alrite? Just walk away silently. Don't attempt to tell me anything about God. Because all i heard about God is no true. So go away...)
I'm suffering...Do you even know that? My heart is full with ache...Do you even know that? I always feel like dying...Do you even know that? Don't be surprised if one day, you will need to come for my orbituary. Or you may see in the newspaper, a teenager died in a tragic accident, teenager died while sleeping, teenager gone crazy. Many times, i thought of suicide. But something in my heart, so heavy that i couldn't kill myself. Something in my heart i must seek out. Everytime i laugh with you guys, you think I'm actually happy? It may be decieving. Sometimes, i look sick, do you think i'm really ill? No one knows my way around.
Someday, i'm going to be rich. Not in my properties, money, or luxury. I'm going to be rich in life. I'm going to pursue my studies, and earn all the money that i could. For the suffering ones, the innocent ones. Someday, you will see me in Africa. I'm not on a tour there. Someday, you will see me working there, working without getting paid. Someday, you will see me alone, leading a solitary life. With no one attached to me. Unless, i found someone who truly undestands me. But, no one understands a bit close to what I'm thinking. No one...
"Coldplau - Square One"
You're in control, is there anywhere you wanna go?
You're in control, is there anything you wanna know?
The future's for discovering
The space in which we're travelling
From the top of the first page
To the end of the last day
From the start in your own way
You just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are
Under the surface trying to break through
Deciphering the codes in you
I need a compass, draw me a map
I'm on the top, I can't get back
Whoa whoa
The first line on the first page
To the end of the last page
From the start in your own way
You just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are
You just want
Somebody listening to what you say
Oh, you just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are
Is there anybody out there who
Is lost and hurt and lonely too
Are they bleeding all your colours into one?
and if you come undone
As if you've been run through
Some catapult it fired you
You wonder if your chance will ever come
Or if you're stuck in square one
Dude.
Where is this all coming from? -_-
Get out with us man. You've been MIA for far too long. :)
Posted by
hxt |
6:22 pm
chill out bro,you know we are here for you :)
Posted by
Anonymous |
10:42 pm
stay strong sooguan. things get rough sometimes but it makes us learn. we're all here. =)
Posted by
Eeflin |
1:05 am
Hey you..I was moved by your thoughts. Sometimes parents, they expect us to do what they think we should do. People these days are just too materialistic. Like my parents, they want me to study and one day live a life full of luxury. But no. I might not want to do that. Similar to what you were thinking. I might study and one day end up in some organisation supporting those in need. Keep it up.
Posted by
Anonymous |
9:17 pm